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An Unoffensive Recipe

November 27, 2009

I have this friend that is my emotional/social twin. For example, we are both easily moved to tears. Movies, babies, inspirational quotes, Oprah – all legitimate triggers. We are also hypersensitive to the emotions of the people around us and spend our lives making sure everyone is okay and that we didn’t do anything to make them not okay. It’s exhausting, really. But man, if you want to hang out with someone that will do their utmost to not offend and/or cause you emotional discomfort, we’re your girls.

A little aside here: I would like to apologize to my mother in law because she recently asked me to email her a few pictures so she could print them off. She could have been wait listed for a heart transplant and received one in the time it took me to get those pictures to her. Apparently if you love me unconditionally, you are exempt from the measures I will take to please you. And while I’m on a roll, I will also apologize for the time I encouraged J.D.’s brother to do consecutive shots of Tabasco sauce mixed with Jamaican ginger beer. Thankfully I was involved in the production of a charming grandchild and thus have earned an endless supply of forgiveness. Right?

Anyway, I called this friend last night to see if she would mind babysitting James for an hour and a half tonight. This was only after an epic battle within myself over the issue of short notice. J.D. had to step in and negotiate an emotional treaty for me.

I called her up and she of course was more than willing, had no plans, was actually waiting by the phone in case I called and asked for just such a favor. Then I invited her over for supper, unless she had other plans, in which case no problem, I hadn’t planned a thing. BUT if she did want to come for supper, that’s great because I’ve got it all planned out.

She said she’d love to come but I really shouldn’t do anything complicated and if I wanted to cancel AT ANY POINT, even half way through supper, she would totally understand. I told her that she wouldn’t notice any effort on my part at all. I was probably going to serve Kraft dinner – I wouldn’t even bother boiling water. We would just sprinkle the cheese powder in the box and eat it with our hands. She thought that was a great idea and asked if she could bring anything. No no no I told her, just yourself. And if you don’t even feel like bringing yourself then that’s okay too.

Here is the slow cooker dinner I have planned that will not make her feel bad. It’s as easy as uncooked macaroni.

Thai Chicken

2.5 pounds of chicken (pieces or breasts)
2 cups of salsa (choose the heat you like)
1/2 cup of peanut butter
4 Tbsp lime juice
2 Tbsp soy sauce
1/2 tsp dried ginger or 2 tsp minced fresh ginger
Hot cooked rice
chopped peanuts

1. Place chicken in slow cooker. Combine salsa, peanut butter, lime juice, soy sauce and ginger. Pour over chicken.
2. Cover and cook on LOW 8 -9 hours or on HIGH 3 to 4 hours.
3. Serve chicken and sauce over rice. Sprinkle with chopped peanuts.

I know. Peanut butter and salsa(?!?) BUT, it is far better than the sum of it’s parts.

10 Comments leave one →
  1. Elena permalink
    November 27, 2009 12:57 pm

    That recipe does sound good. I will try it. I have a slightly similar personality except that I also enjoy offending people. However, after the offense, I feel terrible about (no matter how small the offense) and lose sleep (really) over it until I have apologised in person (even if they have no idea what I am talking about). You’re right, it is exhausting. Sorry.

    • Claire permalink*
      November 27, 2009 3:10 pm

      please don’t apologize, it was my fault.

  2. Elena permalink
    November 27, 2009 1:01 pm

    p.s. I actually apologised to the anaestheologist as I was rolled out of the OR after delivering the twins. Literally: I was still hooked up to cords and lines and everything and I made eye contact with him and pleadingly said, “I’m sorry if I did anything to offend you.” I think he wanted to laugh.

  3. Katie permalink
    November 27, 2009 9:11 pm

    I think chickens will find your recipe offensive.

  4. Claire permalink*
    November 27, 2009 11:33 pm

    Peanut butter is also quite angry. Salsa won’t return my phone calls. I feel awful about all this.

  5. Jaclyn permalink
    November 28, 2009 10:51 am

    This post made me laugh – but the comments (well done, Elena!) and replies made me laugh even harder.

    This recipe is going on my to-do list. Not only have I been looking for more slow-cooker recipes, but I’m a big fan of combing PB with random ingredients. One of my favourite stir-fry sauces involves PB mixed with soy sauce and *Catalina salad dressing*. Yup.

  6. Jean permalink
    November 29, 2009 9:38 am

    Claire comes by this trait legitimately. If I write her an email and she doesn’t answer for two days, I write her an email and apologize for the tone of my last email:

    Dear Claire,

    I’m sorry if my last email offended you. When I said, “It is cold here.” I was not inferring that it is not cold in Whitehorse. Nor was I trying to make you feel as though you should be responsible for any weather I endure here in Salmon Arm. I also probably shouldn’t have said that your father and I went out for supper and a movie. I realize that with a small child you and J.D. can’t just pick up anytime you want and head out for frivolous entertainment. I’m very sorry if this aroused feelings of unbridled envy in you.
    P.S. I’m sorry I can’t make the Thai Chicken. Your Dad hates peanut butter, which may or may not be my fault.

    Also, I really apologize for all of 1991.

  7. Michelle permalink
    June 2, 2010 5:36 pm

    Hello! Found you and this recipe through the dooce community! My family loves this meal. I use pre-cooked chicken that I have de-boned and just heat it all on the stove top, it is wonderful.

    Thanks for sharing!


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