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Bonus Surprise

June 7, 2010

We’re homeowners! Of a real live house. Last Thursday we ironed our beer shirts and offered a thousand more than asking. Fortunately the other guy forgot to put on deodorant and we won by $800. It was supposed to be a token offer, just to feel like we were still playing the game. Even our real estate agent said they’d probably get $5000 more than asking. Silly agent.

We’re still trying to figure out how we managed to secure a house for under $300,000 that does not contain dead bodies in a neighborhood where houses do not go for under $300,000 unless they contain dead bodies. *Note: we did not look extra hard for dead bodies.

It has a new asbestos-free furnace and a recent retrofit (this means they did stuff to make it reasonable in a Yukon winter. It was built in 1975 when reasonable hadn’t been invented yet) Also, it’s only five houses away which means we can use a wagon and J.D.’s biceps to move there. Double bonus!

It definitely needs some loving. I would need some loving too if I had an obstructive wall and was painted household-cleaner-yellow and vinyled in pink from top to bottom. Someone, I’m sure, had to stop these people from vinyling the kitchen appliances. Also, there is a mysteriously placed dryer duct with a towel shoved inside it in the second bedroom but no dryer to be found. Very curious.

But it’s ours! Well, not really yet. Our real estate agent gave us less than two business days to secure a mortgage and get a building inspection done. Silly agent. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.

I’ll let you know if it all falls through and we’re homeless and whiny again.

Amid all the kerfuffle, we’ve become negligent parents and are missing James’ childhood. Thus, he has decided to skip it all together, go to law school, and start putting on his own damn underwear.

5 Comments leave one →
  1. June 7, 2010 10:47 pm

    congratulations! total score – good job you guys! 🙂
    mind you, 5 houses away..? suspiciously close… is the house being sold because the owners mysteriously disappeared? were you not looking for the bodies, because YOU KNOW WHERE YOU HID THEM?! some production you’ve put up Claire – ooh we’re desperately looking for a house, here and there, cant afford anything – all a clever cover up, very clever indeed. i would have suggested at least a few blocks away. but other than that, um, we’re looking for a house too… any tips..? 🙂
    hope that wasnt too creepy 🙂
    the duct with the rag – i’m wondering if there was an air-conditioner or a small stove there? or a small grow-show 🙂
    all the same – congrats again!
    i’m totally jealous 🙂

    • Claire permalink*
      June 8, 2010 9:12 am

      Tip: Creativity is essential in the housing market these days.

  2. Theresa permalink
    June 8, 2010 8:17 am

    YAY! Can’t wait to come see the pink vinyl one day!


    • Claire permalink*
      June 8, 2010 9:14 am

      I will mail you a square. It will not be seeing the light of day much longer.

  3. Jean permalink
    June 9, 2010 9:42 pm

    Did you look in the dryer vent for dead bodies? The towel stuffed in it sounds suspicious.

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